No phone

We had such a great time last week. A little bit of a bump one night but .. I was over it quickly. The person I used to be would have blown up. I instead did what I have been doing for the last few years: staying quiet and to myself. That's not exactly the best way to handle something either, but it's better than angry words flying everywhere and things getting more heated than necessary. I just want someone to be there. Why the f is that so hard?? I don't want someone around 24/7 like a certain someone thinks .. but there isn't even a simple text in the morning anymore. There hasn't been one of those in a long time. Funny how little things like that without fail, always fade. And of course if there's no call or text in the morning, there definitely isn't anything throughout the day.

I watched a movie last night (well, started and then finished today when I got home from work). No Strings Attached. Natalie Portman's character throughout most of the movie is basically where I'm headed: not caring and shutting everyone out. Going about life day to day, but not getting too attached to anyone because.. why bother? You always get hurt anyway so what is the point?

So, relating to the title I put up for this entry.. I turned my phone off tonight almost 2 hours ago (it's almost 8:00 now). I already spoke with my parents, so it's not like anyone else would be expecting me to have my phone on. I texted my "sweetie" more than once today and I rave about us to so many people.. yet, here I am, alone as per usual.. haven't heard from him since one stupid text this morning in response to mine. We don't need to talk tonight. I have my Logan, and that by far is more than enough for me. I'm just tired of having the relationship status and wanting it to work and everything just staying the same. While Logan's dad has seen him less and less in the last year+ .. I have also started to see someone else less and less.. and it has nothing whatsoever to do with me having Logan more. I truly feel like just telling him some days to just leave me alone .. for a week .. a month .. few months! What difference is it going to make? He's already told me nothing can happen with us this year .. so again, everything just stays the same. I'm doing my own thing. I just got a minor promotion at work.. I'm proud to be living on my own - it might be a shit hole but at least I'm doing my own thing, and I'm raising my baby alone, and he's soo stinkin' smart. Also, how could I forget .. I'm 7 courses away from finally having my Bachelor's degree.

I'm doing fine. Alone.